潇湘溪苑exo主鹿晗:求英文笑话

Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
老师:为什么你每天早晨都迟到?
汤姆:每当我经过学校的拐角处,僦看见一个牌子仩写着"学校----慢行".

Let me take it down

An elephant said to a mouse ,"no doubt that you are the smallest znd most useless thing that Ihave e ver seen ."
"Pless ,say it again .Let me take it down ."the mouse said ."I will tell a flea what I know."

为我所用
一头大象对一只小老鼠说：“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。”

“请再说一遍，让我把它记下来。”老鼠说。“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。
参考资料：http://www.english8848.net/bbs/showbbs.asp?bd=12&id=416&totable=1

还有一个不错的网址：http://www.czlgj.com/otherweb/e_c/joke/index.htm

History paper research on the Internet
Man: "How's your history paper coming?"

Woman: "Well, my history professor suggested that I use the Internet for research, and it's been very helpful.

Man: "Really?"

Woman: "Yes! I've already located 17 people who sell them!"

Whose dog is smarter?
谁的狗更聪明？

Two women that are dog owners are arguing about which dog is smarter.
两个女人在为谁家的狗更聪明而争吵。

First Woman : "My dos is so smart, every morning he waits for the paper boy to come around and then he takes the newspaper and brings it to me.
第一个女人说：“我的狗太聪明了，每天早上它等着送报童，然后把拿着报纸送给我。”

Second Woman : "I know..."
第二个女人说：“我知道……”

First Woman : "How?"
第一个女人说：“你怎么知道？”

Second Woman : "My dog told me."
第二个女人说：“我家的狗告诉我的。”

idiot
白痴（傻瓜）

Smith: " I keep hearing the word ' idiot '. I hope you are not referring to me."
史密斯：“我不停地听到‘白痴’一词，我希望你指得并不是我。”

Jones: " Don't be so conceited. As if there are no other idiots in the world."
琼斯：“别自以为是啦（别逞强拉）。你以为世上就没有其他人是白痴啦!”

我发个以前自己写的吧,
today i tell a story to you.
one day a police was running after a thief.
the thief saw some dogs in a small house,then he ran into the house.The police reached the house soon.
And the police asked : what were you doing.
The thief :i am telling a story to the dogs.
这么简单的应该会看到懂吧,
不过要小心一点,被人砸了不要怪我

Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
老师:为什么你每天早晨都迟到?
汤姆:每当我经过学校的拐角处,僦看见一个牌子仩写着"学校----慢行".

Let me take it down

An elephant said to a mouse ,"no doubt that you are the smallest znd most useless thing that Ihave e ver seen ."
"Pless ,say it again .Let me take it down ."the mouse said ."I will tell a flea what I know."

为我所用
一头大象对一只小老鼠说：“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。”

History paper research on the Internet
Man: "How's your history paper coming?"

Woman: "Well, my history professor suggested that I use the Internet for research, and it's been very helpful.

Man: "Really?"

Woman: "Yes! I've already located 17 people who sell them!"