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To her dismay,the doctor diagnosed her with the disease which interferes(1) yuor(2) immune system mercilessly.Her life had(3) depended on the care of her acqaintances(4) and pills for months.But all things has(5) twists.little by little,she has the access of managing herself back.(6)The more (7)therapists have done(8),the more she recovers(9).After the entire recovery,she has promote the awarness of the origin of sickness(10)

主要的错误大约是10个，有两句改写了，改写前原文除了意思不清外也有个别语法和词汇问题，因为改写了，所以不算错误。

1，时态和全文不一致：换成interfered；
2，角色转换了：换成her；
3，时态问题：去掉；
4，拼写错误：acquaintances；
5，单复数：have；
6，意思不清：Little by little, she managed to fight back；
7，定冠词：the；
8，时态问题：did；
9，时态问题：recovered；
10，意思不清：After she recovered, she made an effort to raise the public's awareness on the origin of the sickness.

To her dismay,the doctor diagnosed her with (the) disease which (interferes) (yuor) immune system mercilessly.Her life had (been) depend(ing) on the care of her (acqaintances) and pills for months.But all things (has) twists.little by little,she has the access?? of managing herself back.The more therapists have done,the more she recovers.After the entire recovery,she has (promote) the (awarness) of the origin?/ of sickness.

() wrong spelling or modification.
? no idea of the chinese meaning.

But all things have twists
has promoted